Hayaati

StoryCorps- Making memories forever.

2010-02-09T22:10:00.003-05:00

We always speak of historic figures and events quite fondly. We honor and glorify people the media finds to be of importance. But we usually seem to forget that we have heroes who live among us. They live on our block; down the street; in our homes. We do glorify them when we talk of past happenings but how often do we have these marked in history? We only speak of them from the stories that have been passed down to us. Story Corps found a way to make them a part of our history.

StoryCorps is an independent nonprofit organization whose mission is to honor and celebrate one another’s lives through listening. Established in 2003, StoryCorps wanted to help the common man incorporate his life, experiences, story into history.

I learned of StoryCorps through a book “Listening is an Act of Love”. The book contains several short stories of people whose stories are quite inspiring. It makes you realize that the man sitting next to you on the ‘El’, the lady behind the cash register, your teacher, and even your own mother has a story to tell. Stories that might change the way you think or just help you see your own life with a much better perspective.

StoryCorps started off with a small team of volunteers who wanted to make the experience of recording and preserving stories accessible to everyone. Dave Isay, the founder of StoryCorps, started by opening a small booth in October 2003 when they established a booth in New York City’s Grand Central Terminal. It gave ordinary people to reserve a time slot where they could go in themselves or with someone important/close to them and just sit there and listen to their story. These moments get recorded and at the end of the story, you get an opportunity to take a copy of the session with you. Something you can listen to over the years and reminiscence.

Over the years StoryCorps has established a few mobile and permanent booths. They have also launched initiatives to remember people who’ve been affected by the World Trade Center tragedy and also for people affected by memory loss. In June 2007 they received the Peabody Award, which is an establishment that honors achievements in electronic media.

StoryCorps has given the common man a platform to acknowledge and honor lives that go unnoticed; lives that make a difference without knowing. If you ever get a chance, take some time out of your schedule and do visit a StoryCorps booth. I know I would love to take my parents there one day. They are the most beautiful part of my life. A couple that has molded me into the person I am; people that make me complete. It’s a small gesture to acknowledge them. I am positive we can all do that. And if a StoryCorps booth seems too far, a video camera shouldn’t be.

(http://www.storycorps.org)

Gift Giving: Be Kind Towards Your Wallet

2009-12-06T21:03:00.002-05:00

With the holiday season already started, it is quite hard to get a grip of how much we spend. During these economical hardships many can’t seem to put together a good gift giving plan. You don’t want to spend too much, but then again you don’t want to give something that looks cheap.

Creativity always helps! And well if you aren’t the creative type, the ideas below might help!

Narrow down your “to give” list. You don’t have to gift people you see once in a blue moon,even you are related to you. A “happy holidays” card works well too!

Prioritize your list. List the people and the price range for each. This gives you a better idea of where to start first.

Look for coupons. No, I am not the coupon queen but trust me, there are always coupons out there! I cannot stress enough; anything that helps you save is a bonus! A website I most commonly use is www.retailmenot.com. It has coupon codes you can use for shopping online. Most of these stores also have the option of picking up the items at the store which is quite handy if you are on a time crunch and also if you don’t like looking through racks and piles.

Books and music are not only cheap but also make good gifts. Everyone has an avid reader and/or a music fanatic in their family. This makes the perfect gift for them. They even have E-books and iTunes that you can give which are more convenient to carry everywhere.

Gift cards. You might say “duh! we all know that.” A lot of people tend to give people cards to certain stores or restaurants. Try giving the prepaid Visa/MasterCard. They recipient can use it almost anywhere.

Creative gift baskets. This is my absolute favorite. I received a gift basket this year for my birthday. My friend thought it would be a great idea to give me something I would enjoy and actually use. Since I love cooking and baking, she gave me a basket various kinds of pasta, pasta sauces, cake mixes, frostings, and also a recipe book which compiled recipes from her grandmother’s and mother’s kitchen.

So go ahead, think outside the box. Don’t let the tight wallet hold you down. Make it a thoughtful giving.

Oh and yes, happy holidays… to you and yours.
=]

11/26: We Haven’t Forgiven. We Haven’t Forgotten.

2009-11-26T23:59:00.004-05:00

November 26, 2009-a whole year has passed by and today Mumbai stands stronger.

Mumbai/Bombay reminds me of traffic, colors of Holi, pani puri at Juhu Beach, Lakme fashion shows, and how can I forget, Bollywood.

What touches the heart more than all the above mentioned though are the November 26 attacks. There wasn’t one but eight attacks that hit this gorgeous city and it took away a lot. Chatrapati Shivaji Terminus, Taj Mahal Palace and Tower, Cama hospital, Leopold Café, Nariman House, Oberoi Trident, St. Xavier’s College, and Metro Cinema were the targets. After a grueling 60 hours of turmoil and bloodshed, Mumbai found some silence. A silence which represented the dead, the angry, and the helpless of this big city of big dreams.
You may ask, why 11/26 when the world has had tragedies like the London subway bombings or even bigger, The World Trade Center.

In actual, neither one of them is bigger. The awareness created for each makes it important. Many developing countries go unnoticed. We find it important to embrace their colors, festivities, foods, and cultures but how important do we find it to help them through their times of crisis?

When we live in such a globalized society, many of us fail to understand that there are yet a handful out there that conform to ignorance. These people do not belong to any belief system in particular neither do they have an identity. It is their way of making themselves noticed. It is their way to make the world consider their existence; a very pathetic one.

Why I write about this issue? Many girls find it necessary to buy Kim Kardashian’s black skinnys or the Preity Zinta hair color, while boys find the need to have the scruffy Johnny Depp look or the Shahrukh abs. We as the younger generation forget to move past the materialistic things in life. We have forgotten to truly represent who we are. We have a faded idea of our roots. Our opinions are strongly based on what we hear or see more than what we feel and learn. Have we ever sat down and re-evaluated how we feel about religions and cultures prospering harmoniously? Have we ever thought of how we can help? How can we make this any better?

There is a widespread notion of terrorism being linked with Islam. From my understanding, the Quran, Gita, Torah, Bible, nor the Guru Granth Sahib propagates terrorism. We are taught to believe in what we want, be respectful of others beliefs, and co-exist peacefully. Shahrukh Khan says in an interview, “my religion is hard work and to spread happiness.”

Then why aren’t we making a change? Aamir Khan says in his blog, “In my opinion, you really want to change things? Change yourself. Each one of us needs to take a very honest look inwards and rectify and work on what we think is wrong with us. If each one of us does that individually then there will be a sea change in our society at large. I have to promise myself that I will not be corrupt, will play my role in society with honesty and sincerity. Doctors, lawyers, judges, people in the IAS, police force, media persons, businessmen, job workers, labour force, everyone. We have to stop thinking of our own individual gain and loss and do what is honest, true and right, and think collective. It calls for personal sacrifice in this time of chaos but from chaos will emerge clarity. Even if we don’t manage to achieve this for ourselves we will achieve it for our children.”

Let us be the change. Let us change.

“Abhi jiska khoon na khaula, woh khoon nahi paani hai.
Joh desh ke kaam na aaye, woh bekaar jawaani hai.”- Rang De Basati

State, Clark, and Around

2009-11-06T19:31:00.003-05:00

It's my first quarter going to school in the city and I can't seem to completely comprehend the poverty level in America.
It is hard to see all these people all over the city with McDonalds cups or something of that sort asking for spare change.
The other day, I had a lady walk up to me and ask me help her pay for an Amtrak ticket.

I almost question why the city still has these people on the streets?
Why do we have an outrageous budget to help win the Olympic bid but not to help the homeless?
I'm sure these people have their part to play in being where they are, but then why is it that the city doesn't feel compelled to do more and beyond what it has done so far for these people?

Soul Searcher

2009-08-29T03:27:00.008-04:00

Ramadan is a month of reflection to me. A month where I try sitting back and thinking of "me".

While I sit here through these endless nights and yawnful days (well atleast till school starts), I really wonder what "soul searching" really means.

I often ask for advice. Not because I don't know what to do, but maybe more so because I think I know what to do, I just don't know if it is right or wrong. I don't ask to make sure I please people but I just ask for a second opinion. I don't know why I ask. I was told very recently by someone very close to me, "you know what you really want, when you know who you really are".

Who are we though, for real? Are we defined by what we think or by what we do. Not all thoughts become actions and not all actions are always thought about. Impulse, emotions, compromise, ideas, and dreams always come in play, always.

It may almost sound like I am constantly confused with the relationships I am in but don't get me wrong, relationships and their fine print, according to me atleast, are what define most of me. Being a daughter, sister, friend, peer mediator, etc these roles make me think twice of what I should've/could've done and what I should do now and next. It is almost hard to not think of others close to one before doing something. But does that make one a pushover or putting yourself on top of the priority list (which is, trust me, a real good thing) make you selfish. When is it that you draw the line of how this priority list shifts its order? It's maybe a power within you, a strength or even maybe a weakness that can help you through this but then again what do you need to do in order to find that strength? Pull out your scrapbook and all the other stuff from the attic to reflect back or just sit and see how things pan out? Just because my relationships mean so much to me does that mean that "that is who I really am"- a person defined merely by the relationships I am connected with?
It is almost frustrating to not know who you are but it is more frustrating to start searching for yourself. And how do you know if you have "found yourself"?

It is almost quite confusing and frustrating but then again if we all knew the answers to everything this world would either be super peaceful or waging a crazy war. Is it good to ask advice? and if so, what type of people are the right ones? Many turn to close friends and family but then again is it always safe to turn to people who are constantly protecting you? What defines soul searching? Figuring out who you are or who you can be

A Complicated Thought Process

2009-07-20T01:23:00.002-04:00

As I lay in bed reading my rosary, a thought came into my mind. It revolved more so around immigrant and first generation children living in western countries.
Many and most of us are expected to follow what we have been taught by our parents eg: dress modestly, don't talk to boys/girls, become doctors or engineers (or well if you really aren't that smart accountant works), spend most of your time with family, don't question the elders, etc, etc. But what truly got me thinking was the following question: why is asking or stating what you prefer or desire considered rebellion and not stating your mind? Is having your thoughts controlled by your adults a sign of growing into being a model child and accepting the path of righteousness? And where and when does the double standard in middle eastern and desi families usually end?
I was recently having a conversation with my dad about how I was never allowed to leave home for college until recently when I was let to dorm. Mind you, I'm 22. But then at the same time, when my brother was going off to college last year, my family made a comment like, "hun, if only you would have done all this during your freshmen year, we would've gotten a hang of dorming and all that stuff by now and it would be so much easier for your brother". The thought process in my mind was along the lines of- Wtf! Are you serious? Ugh, I'm disgusted. Scenario two- my friend recently asked his folks if he could take a year off from his undergrad and attend culinary school (mind you, he can cook!). The most loudest response in unison from his parents was "WHAT? Is this what we are still alive for? To see our son become a chef. What are we going to tell people? That our son knows how to chop onions with his eyes closed?". Scenario three- a close friend of mine proposed to her parents (who have been asking her quite casually but quite often about her plans for marriage) that she is willing to get married only after she graduates next year and all she expects is that a groom has a masters degree. The mother responds saying_ "Oh God! So now our judgement isn't good enough that you needs to set requirements. What makes you think we will find you some aaltoo faaltoo nikamma(useless loser)? Whatever we find you, I'm sure he will keep you happy. Now go finish doing what you were doing!".
Well there are many more situations like this that I've experienced or heard of, and I always wonder why our opinions never matter or seem childish to our adults. It isn't to prove that we are smarter than our elders but it is only a way of us stating what we prefer, want, desire. Is that so bad? Many kids these days have started living a double life, they do what their parents ask of them but then they tend to go out and party wild, drink like fishes, abuse prescriptions, acquire drugs, and all that good stuff.

What bothers me is the thought that are these kids better than the ones who outright rebel and find a way to fulfill their dreams, or is it better to turn to parent obeying robots who may or may not find extreme sources to vent their frustation?

The "Phase" Value

2009-05-03T01:32:00.004-04:00

I took a real long walk today, about 7 miles. The Jersey boardwalk during this time of the year is quite a nice place to clean up your mind. Through that walk, I took a bit out to stare at the lamp lady (quite a lot of memories there) and I thought... many hold on to old things and make it harder for themselves to accept a change.

Is it the "phase" we hold on to and give it so much thought and appreciation that we learn to live in our memories? Do we really set a bar of high standards for ourselves after heart breaking experiences , in hopes that we either meet someone amazing or even that it would take the person to reach it before they can hurt you? Maybe it was mostly the fact that the situation you were in that makes you want to not let go. But truly, is the phase getting us phased out?

Reading Between the Lines

2009-04-12T00:21:00.006-04:00

Relationships are confusing. As a matter of fact so is life. There are many decisions one needs to make between the time they get ready for work and get to work. People think that a relationship is what they need in life for them to be happy. And when they do find "the one" it is sweet, amazing, and maybe the best thing that has happened to them in the longest.

And then slowly comes the turn in the road. The lies, the avoiding, the cheating, and the insecurities show up. They may just be ups and downs, bumps in the road but sometimes, many of us let it happen over and over again. We let it happen to us. It may be a psychological, emotional, or physical thing. But many fall prey to it. Both sexes, and I say this because many think only women are prey to this, sometimes don't know how to stand their ground even when they know that a no is not enough. Many give in and convince themselves into beleiving that they love each, hence it will work or "oh it won't happen again", etc. No one can really justify why we try to justify things to ourselves.

Why do we let this happen, why do we fall into this trap. Isn't learning through others' and self experiences enough? In today's fast paced world where everything has become about being selfish (in a good way and yes, moderately in a bad way) are we forgetting to look at and realize ourselves?

Look Within

2009-04-09T05:06:00.000-04:00

The college student nights, where you study all night and sleep through classes. That is what many go through for four years or more. These come with experiences that set you as person for most of your life, well until you decide to get married; not in Vegas, in real life.
To many girls, college is meeting your "mate" and deciding how to spend the rest of their lives together. But has anyone thought of the kind of people they attract. Is it the someone who is a no one, the ghetto rapper wannabe, someone older than you who you have met else where, or the basketball player that lives two doors down? Cute aren't they all! But what is in you that makes them want you is the question. Is it your style, the looks, maybe the attitude, or maybe just because you are the oppsite sex.

Is it something within us from the start, is it something we can change, or is it them and what they are within themselves? Shallow it may seem, but maybe each sex thinks quite highly of themselves or maybe they think that way to cover the weaknesses they have. Is it safe to say that many fail to see that dating is really a search within yourself before a search for the "significant other"?

Walking on Glass

2009-04-05T02:54:00.000-04:00

I woke up this afternoon, to a foggy sky, with the thought of wanting to go to Liberty State Park, but the thought of going there panicked me. I lay there contemplating what was a wiser idea, facing my fears and being stronger or just ignoring it and hoping that it will get better soon. So instead of getting out of bed, I chose to turn around and go right back to sleep. I wonder if it was a pessimistic move or an optimistic one. The thought stuck in my head thru the rest of the day.

Is it just Liberty State Park or will it be Canal Street as well or even Secaucus or Times Square? Sometimes we walk down the street reminiscing. Are we scared to make new memories in places where we've left old ones?

*Hayaati*